Lesson three: Reading – The Social Media Phenomenon of “Sugar Daddy” and “Sugar Mommy” Relationships in Nigeria: A Growing Concern

Social media has transformed how we connect, and it’s also reshaping relationships. In Nigeria, “sugar daddy” and “sugar mommy” relationships are increasingly visible. A “sugar daddy” is often defined as an older, financially secure man who provides money, gifts, or other resources to a younger partner, often in exchange for companionship or a romantic relationship. Similarly, a “sugar mommy” is typically an older, financially independent woman who offers similar support to a younger partner. However, these definitions, while commonly used, oversimplify a complex issue. The core dynamic is a power imbalance, often based on age and financial resources, where one party provides support and the other receives it. This creates a situation ripe for exploitation, even if the arrangement begins with seemingly mutual consent. The exchange is rarely equal, and the potential for manipulation is high. It’s important to move beyond these simple definitions and examine the underlying power dynamics, potential risks, and societal factors that contribute to these relationships. Platforms like Facebook, Instagram and TikTok  often portray these arrangements as glamorous, showcasing a “soft life” and financial security. But this portrayal masks a complex and often troubling reality.

These relationships blur the lines of consent, coercion, and grooming. They exist in a complex space. A 2021 Lagos State University study found that 67% of female university students surveyed had been approached online for transactional relationships. Many cited economic hardship as the main reason they’d consider such arrangements. A 2019 UNICEF report revealed that 30% of young girls in Northern Nigerian tertiary institutions had received online advances from older men offering financial incentives for relationships. These statistics paint a stark picture of the economic pressures facing young people.

Nigeria’s economy presents challenges. High unemployment, especially among young people, creates vulnerability. Cultural expectations to achieve a certain lifestyle, often through marriage or material possessions, can be difficult to meet through traditional means. This can make “sugar” relationships seem like a shortcut to financial stability. These relationships are not new. They existed before social media. But the internet has amplified them. It has created a vast marketplace.

These relationships have serious consequences. Young people involved are at higher risk for STIs, unplanned pregnancies, and psychological distress. A 2020 Mirabel Centre report on sexual exploitation in Lagos found that 43% of victims in these relationships experienced emotional manipulation and financial blackmail. The power dynamic is unequal. The older person often has more resources and influence. This can lead to exploitation.

It’s crucial to acknowledge the spectrum of experiences. While many young people are coerced or manipulated, some may enter these relationships willingly. They might perceive benefits, like financial support for education or a perceived higher social status. Some might attempt to set boundaries or negotiate terms. Understanding these diverse experiences is crucial for creating effective interventions. However, the inherent power imbalance always creates a risk of exploitation, even when there’s an attempt to establish some level of agency.

What can be done? We need targeted digital literacy education. Young people need to understand the risks of online grooming and exploitation. They need skills to recognize manipulative tactics. They need to know how to protect themselves online. We also need stronger policies. Law enforcement should investigate cases of online grooming and exploitation. Platforms should have better mechanisms for reporting abuse. Communities must address the root causes. This includes tackling economic inequality. It means creating more opportunities for young people. It also means challenging cultural norms that normalize the commodification of young people’s bodies. 

Remember to engage with the additional reading materials available to bolster your understanding. Take care, and I’ll see you in the next lecture.